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Off topic: lightbulb joke...

by mildside (Friar)
on Aug 11, 2003 at 04:09 UTC ( #282738=perlmeditation: print w/ replies, xml ) Need Help??

Q: How many Perl programmers/monks does it take to write the code to change a lightbulb?

My Answer:

10. One to write the code, and 9 to tell them they should have enabled warnings and 'use strict;'.

Any better/funnier answers welcome.

Cheers!

Comment on Off topic: lightbulb joke...
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by atcroft (Monsignor) on Aug 11, 2003 at 04:13 UTC

    I would suspect maybe you forgot about the one who points out there is already a module on CPAN for it as well, and maybe point them to a module like Acme::Lightbulb::Current or similar...

    Update (Sun Aug 10 23:42 CDT 2003): Anyone else have perl jokes/perl humor to share? Just wondering, from some of the ones I've seen in the CB from time to time...

      I think what you mean here is that the answer is "None -- zero: the code is already written and freely available on CPAN".

      Now, if the question is "how many perl programmers did it take to write that module?", the answer is probably "Most of them!"

      Perl::Humour
      There's a new micro version of Perl out

      It's called Mini-Perl.

      lame humour from my boss :-)


      "Ex libris un peut de tout"
        I can only assume your boss is a fan of the late Minnie Pearl, a Grand Ole Opry regular who wore her fashionable hats with the sales tag still affixed. She'd call out her trademark greeting in a coarse shreik, "How-dee!"

        Either that, or your boss needs to rethink that career as a comedian. Or I need to stop trying to read so hard into punchlines. Or both...

        --
        [ e d @ h a l l e y . c c ]

        Are you aware that miniperl is a real thing? You have it on your system. It is used during the build process of perl.
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by sauoq (Abbot) on Aug 11, 2003 at 04:18 UTC

    You also forgot about the one that benchmarks it, the one that golfs it, the two that rewrite it in OO and functional styles, and the last one who just complains that none of the others have written decent unit tests.

    -sauoq
    "My two cents aren't worth a dime.";
    
      Then there's the one complaining the poster didn't explain why he was changing the lightbulb in the first place. Maybe there's are better solutions to the bigger darkness problem...
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by waswas-fng (Curate) on Aug 11, 2003 at 04:23 UTC
    merlyn's column on screwing in lightbulbs is Here. He will tell you that Acme::Current is funnier than lightbulbs ever could be..

    -Waswas
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke... (slightly further OT...)
by ybiC (Prior) on Aug 11, 2003 at 04:56 UTC
    Not to pollute this thread with no-relation-to-Perl-whatsoever humor, but...

    So the jumper cables walk into the bar.   After giving a long hard stare, the bartender says... "Well, I guess I'll serve you, but just don't start anything, ya hear?"

    ==================================================

    So the slice of bread walks into the bar and orders a beer.   The bartender replies "Sorry pal, we don't serve food."

    ==================================================

    So the perlmonk walks into the bar and starts telling the "string walks into the bar" joke, but comes to his senses in time to quit while he's behind.   {grin}

      cheers,
      ybiC

      striving toward Perl Adept
      (it's pronounced "why-bick")

    Update: cosmetic formatting tweaks

Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by perrin (Chancellor) on Aug 11, 2003 at 05:08 UTC
    You call that a spec?!
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by chunlou (Curate) on Aug 11, 2003 at 06:13 UTC
    According to recent experience, it takes one Abigail-II to write the code, one BrowserUk to explain why/how it works, 100+ others to chant it's good stuff.
      Right on. :)

      ----
      Zak
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by mildside (Friar) on Aug 11, 2003 at 06:56 UTC
    ... then another one to write the web interface, and yet another one to re-write it using the CGI module.

    Cheers!

      ... then another to point out that the new Python module claims it is "Perl lightbulb compatible".
        ... then another to point out that the new Python module claims it is "Perl lightbulb compatible".

        Is that as opposed to being "Clear lightbulb compatible?" :)

        Cheers!

      ...and one more to point out that CGI.pm doesn't use strict.

      Elgon

      Please, if this node offends you, re-read it. Think for a bit. I am almost certainly not trying to offend you. Remember - Please never take anything I do or say seriously.

Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by didier (Vicar) on Aug 11, 2003 at 08:05 UTC
    Plagiarizing someone(?) the answer is 10:

    One to change the lightbulb
    and a programmer explaining binary numbers.

      I think you mean 01 not 10. 01 is bin for 2.

      -Waswas

        No, 10 is binary for 2.

        Think about this for a second... If 01 was binary for 2, then 00 would be binary for 1 and then what would zero be?

Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by greenFox (Vicar) on Aug 11, 2003 at 08:43 UTC
    I thought Real Perl Programmers ™ weren't afraid of the dark...

    --
    Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise. Seek what they sought. -Basho

Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by BrowserUk (Pope) on Aug 11, 2003 at 09:13 UTC

    ...screw in a lightbulb....now there's adventurous for you.


    Examine what is said, not who speaks.
    "Efficiency is intelligent laziness." -David Dunham
    "When I'm working on a problem, I never think about beauty. I think only how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong." -Richard Buckminster Fuller
    If I understand your problem, I can solve it! Of course, the same can be said for you.

Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by artist (Parson) on Aug 11, 2003 at 10:52 UTC
    atleast one expert to obfuscate it.. So and lightbulb will be changed but it won't be easy to find out how it is done.

Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by ellem (Hermit) on Aug 11, 2003 at 12:46 UTC
    String walks into a bar, bartender says we don't serve strings. String goes outside messes up his hair and bends himself around and goes back in.

    "Hey aren't you that string I threw out a minute ago?"

    "NO, I'm a frayed knot!"
    --
    ellem@optonline.net
    There's more than one way to do it, but only some of them actually work.
      i think "im now a tie()'d string" might be more appropriate
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by JPaul (Hermit) on Aug 11, 2003 at 14:28 UTC
    I got this from my brother at home while on holiday; He's 16 and I'm easily amused, so there you go.

    Q: How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    A: Two. But the hard part is getting in.

    JP,
    -- Alexander Widdlemouse undid his bellybutton and his bum dropped off --

Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by Mr. Muskrat (Abbot) on Aug 11, 2003 at 14:34 UTC
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by erebus (Initiate) on Aug 11, 2003 at 19:26 UTC
    Q: How many Perl programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    A: Perl programmers don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in hot tubs.

      Have you ever actually screwed in a hot tub? Screwing in a light bulb would probably be both easier and more comfortable. Despite their reputation, hot tubs are really only good for getting started.

      -sauoq
      "My two cents aren't worth a dime.";
      
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by LukeyBoy (Friar) on Aug 11, 2003 at 23:53 UTC
    One. Just don't ever, ever ask them to change it again.
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by leriksen (Curate) on Aug 12, 2003 at 00:45 UTC
Re: Off topic: lightbulb joke...
by monktim (Friar) on Aug 14, 2003 at 16:48 UTC
    None. It's a hardware problem.

    Yea I know it's an old joke, I couldn't resist.

      None. It's a hardware problem.

      Yea I know it's an old joke, I couldn't resist.

      I'd have been disappointed if nobobody had contributed that one. I was expecting it to be one of the first replies - thanks for not disappointing me!

      Cheers!

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