If Perl were a woman:
in reply to If perl was a woman...
- I wouldn't understand her so well.
- She would shop for new stylish GUI's incessantly.
- Command line switches would all start with "-Please honey?"
- Her logic would be tempered by occasional mood swings.
- CPAN would have flowers growing in its garden, and new curtains to match its color-coordinated CSSheets.
- One liners? I don't think so. No such thing.
- Golf? Finish your chores first.
- She wouldn't need sort, as things would never get out of order in the first place.
- She wouldn't be able to execute scripts that require maps.
- V-strings would never have been invented; too darn uncomfortable.
- She would call her male friend to help whenever a bug is found.
- CPAN would be her closet full of mix-and-match accessories.
- Use of strictures no longer optional. But warnings will be in the form of stern looks.
- She would no longer become jealous of the computer when her husband spends long hours fiddling with her code.
- There is still more than one way to do it.