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jdporter's collection of cb snippets

by jdporter (Canon)
on Jun 20, 2006 at 15:06 UTC ( #556422=note: print w/ replies, xml ) Need Help??


in reply to jdporter's treehouse
in thread jdporter

Please do not vote or reply. If you have a comment on this, please /msg me. TIA!

Snippets of CB Conversations

2005-05-25 11:45:53planetscape:the objective is to find a word I have heard but can't spell
2005-05-25 11:48:02Roy Johnson:You can always run it by us and see if it rings any bells.
2005-05-25 11:48:29Roy Johnson:We're a highly advanced neural net with phonetic training.
2005-05-25 11:48:57Roy Johnson:We even pass the Turing test.

2005-08-08 17:07:23jdporter:Globs are funny. So are filehandles.
2005-08-08 17:07:54Intrepid:s/funny/magical/ ;-)
2005-08-08 17:08:57jdporter:Just like mushrooms, either word applies.
2005-08-08 17:09:24jdportersmokes a filehandle and drops another glob.

2005-10-03 11:20:21digiryde:I started looking for ways to seemlessly wrap http I/O this weekend.
2005-10-03 11:23:27digiryde:I want to understand POE better.
2005-10-03 11:24:55tye:I hear he always used /usr/bin/less
2005-10-03 11:26:33jZed:I thought he used /usr/bin/never/more

2005-10-18 11:05:56wfsp:I put a cd in when there already was one in there. Made a horrible noise.
2005-10-18 11:07:44bart:It's called "music", wfsp.

2005-10-19 12:51:04BerntB:(-: I smelled a music flame war and since noone else started it, I had to :-)
2005-10-19 12:52:20NodeReaper has swallowed BerntB. BerntB was tasty!
2005-10-19 12:52:41dwildesnl:burn, BerntB, burn!
2005-10-19 12:55:58BerntB:Hmm.. "bite me" has double meanings in CB?
2005-10-19 12:56:39dwildesnl:everything does, BerntB :)

2005-11-17 15:53:01theorbtwo: If you don't agree with the decisions of the power users, bring it up with the gods. If you don't like the decisions of the gods, bring it up with vroom. If you don't like the decisions of vroom, feel free to leave.

2005-11-22 12:13:03Spidy:Woah, creepy. diotalevi isn't here!
2005-11-22 12:13:39diotalevi sneaks up behind Spidy, very, very, quietly.
2005-11-22 12:15:08NodeReaper sneaks up behind diotalevi, very, very, quietly.
2005-11-22 12:16:12diotalevi pirouettes and asks da grim one for a fling on the dance floor.
2005-11-22 12:19:52NodeReaper:Shall I lead or would like to my dear diotalevi?
2005-11-22 12:20:52NodeReaper grins and shows lots of teeth
2005-11-22 12:21:32diotalevi demurrs. Take me for a spin and lets see what you're made of.
2005-11-22 12:21:24planetscape .oO( is NodeReaper wearing his negligee? )
2005-11-22 12:23:22NodeReaper:No, I borrowed the vote-fairy's tutu.
2005-11-22 12:25:12planetscape:you look quite fetching, NodeReaper
2005-11-22 12:26:04tye:yeah, bones look that way, planetscape... to dogs

2006-01-17 22:27:51DigitalKitty:I'm frequently surprised by how often various monks appear within the realm of my dreams. Spending so much time in the cb must have that effect. <hehe>
2006-01-17 22:29:42DigitalKitty:Only once or twice have I been truly surprised to meet another monk (diotalevi). The other encounters were almost as if we had been classmates / friends for years.
2006-01-17 22:31:28McDarren:wow...you dream about PM?
2006-01-17 22:32:48DigitalKitty:Music is a common facet. Watching and listening to jdporter stand with his feet close together, hands clasped behind his back while crooning an an operatic brit-pop fashion. Nice.
2006-01-17 22:33:35jdporter coughs
2006-01-17 22:34:23jdporter has a way of emerging from the shadows at just the right moment
2006-01-17 22:34:49DigitalKitty grins at jdporter.
2006-01-17 22:36:46DigitalKitty:I think the first time I had a dream about a monk was when jdporter was singing (see above for details) and I was buying an ice tea at someplace like Starbucks. It was around noon but they had a spotlight set-up and I thought that was unusual.
2006-01-17 22:39:24DigitalKitty:I remember leaning on the counter, sipping tea, and thinking: I'm going to surprise him when he finishes that song. He was crooning: And SOOOO Sally can wait..she knows its late as we're walkin' on by...
2006-01-17 23:25:27DigitalKitty:VZN eq 'Verizon'? (Scene) {boss} Dammit Porter! Where are our trucks at this moment? That shipment cannot be late. (jdporter) {reaches across desk and taps three keys} Relax Marvin, I've written a mod_perl program that uses Google maps and real-time GPS processing to show exactly where each of them are located. The exact coordinates are even updated graphically every 5 seconds.

2006-03-07 15:43:29jeffa takes his new laptop for a spin
2006-03-07 15:44:15sporty:jeffa: just don't sit on it first
2006-03-07 15:45:37jeffa revs the engine
2006-03-07 15:46:09jeffa:now for the stress test: does it recover well when dropped 17 stories onto Times Square
2006-03-07 15:47:49jeffa:stress test passed -- but i killed a street mime
2006-03-07 15:48:11rhesa:those will grow back, jeffa
2006-03-07 15:48:21sporty:jeffa, we have no mimes in nyc
2006-03-07 15:48:23ww:nah, he's just playing dead.
2006-03-07 15:48:25rhesa:jeffa, sorry :)
2006-03-07 15:48:48virtualsue:jeffa: that's almost a mitzvah

2006-03-09 16:13:34DigitalKitty:jdporter I need to scale back the caffeine consumption (Dream) Dark 'n stormy night. Full moon. Isolated mansion on a hill. You were wearing a tuxedo and tails with a top hat and sitting at a HUGE organ playing 'House of the Rising Sun' by...
2006-03-09 16:14:49jdporter:I'm telling you, Anna Beth, that was no dream. Your powers of clairvoyance are phenomenal.
2006-03-09 16:15:41DigitalKitty:...Eric Burdon (of the Animals) and singing just like the CD. I was riding around on these winding dusty roads near the mansion in a long black car (passenger) with a mysterious driver. After multiple (unnecessary) turns, we pulled into the circular...
2006-03-09 16:15:49jdporter:Did you notice the part where I threw in a little flourish of Cream's Sunshine Of Your Love?
2006-03-09 16:18:52DigitalKitty:...driveway and pushed open the heavy oak doors. The sound was extremely loud and almost operatic. The tuned pipes were resembled immense spires and I was intrigued by your gaunt appearance (very Halloween-esque).
2006-03-09 16:20:29jdporter does a silent dance of taunting.
2006-03-09 16:21:19DigitalKitty:jdporter++ .oO( That man is an artist).

2006-03-30 15:34:55diotalevi:That's funny you should mention the arrow of time earlier, Corion, since Data::Postponed is about reversing that. ]:-}
2006-03-30 15:35:38diotalevi:Kinda/sorta.
2006-03-30 15:36:00Corion:diotalevi: You're aware that while ( 0 <-- $time ) { also is valid code and reverses the flow of time? ;-)
2006-03-30 15:37:00kutsu:so Data::Postponed is the beta version of a time machine?!
2006-03-30 15:37:46Corion:kutsu: So far, it only works in the forward direction. :)
2006-03-30 15:39:26kutsu:could it make an hour take a minute so I only had to work a 10-minute day? :)
2006-03-30 15:39:59Corion:kutsu: Sure, but the seconds will feel slightly longer ;)

2006-10-09 09:12:57virtualsue:I'm so happy advocate's bf is here. She sprained her ankle last night and he gets to take her to the dr
2006-10-09 09:17:06virtualsue:she did it playing badminton (again)
2006-10-09 09:18:23blue_cowdawg: wasn't aware that badminton was a full contact sport.
2006-10-09 09:20:09virtualsue:it is the way these guys play it
2006-10-09 09:20:57Corion:blue_cowdawg: Why do you think they found it necessary to put a net between the parties? ;-))
2006-10-09 09:26:07kutsu: remembers his friends making flash light tag a contact sport
2006-10-09 09:31:42Corion:You used the Maglite Police Brutality flash lights? ;)

[marto] : I write software for the Nuclear and banking industries at the moment.
[clinton] : nuclear and banking - interesting combination
rhesa hopes marto never confuses interest rates and decay rates
[imp] : atomic transactions++

[ jdporter ] : for P anti-D3-branes the probe approximation is not good, there is a competing effect which can overcome the desire of the anti-D3s to embiggen: their attraction towards the wrapped D5s. Hence, the non-supersymmetric states would naively be meta-stable.
[ dewey ] : boy did I ever come into this conversation at the wrong time...

[ thezip ] : thezip moondances
[ injunjoel ] : injunjoel hands thezip a belt and tells him to pull his pants up.
[ thezip ] : thezip points out that it is quite impossible for his trousers to be down, since he is holding his crotch already
[ injunjoel ] : injunjoel points out to thezip that holding ones crotch does not imply that ones pants are up... the possibilities are left as an exercise for the reader :)

[ SFLEX ] : what should a perl programers resume look like?
[ Petruchio ] : Like line noise, of course.

[props]: castaway is a bot ?
[tye]: s/is a/has a/; inheritance--

planetscape coils into a ball and goes to sleep
tye . o O ( dragonball zzzzz ? )

[Corion]: Corion rejoices. My new phone has arrived :) Except that it has a singapore power adapter ...
[Anno]: that'll be some extension cord

[Unforgiven]: alarm(0);
[tye]: Unforgiven has an additive identity crisis?

[Nalababu]: how do I compare one column of array to another and print those values that match?
[jkva]: We use 2 people. If we go down into a cellar we have a third person 'feed' it.

This was a case of a hilarious juxtaposition arising from the collision of two independent simultaneous conversations.


[castle]: I am a new user ... and I've posted a perl doubt
[planetscape]: oh no, a doubt!?
[planetscape]: despite this being a Monastery, we do not actually deal in matters of faith, castle. Questions, OTOH...

[ambrus] shakes fist towards computer
[tye]: just roll the dice

Voronich feels oddly soiled, having just typed man touch at a prompt.


[Voronich] has decided that his next lathe project is chopsticks.
[marto]: you're going to play a piano with a lathe?
[Voronich]: it's either that or a tesla coil,
[jdporter]: you're going to play a piano with a tesla coil?

[clinton] apologises to all and sundry for his base humour
[Corion]: clinton: You should know that the humor here is purported to be more acidic, so pouring base humor here makes for an explosive mix ;)
[clinton] bubbles over

[moritz]-> lunch
[LanX] prefers lanx <- lunch

[moritz]: if you need to hide some code to keep it "secure", you have a problem anyway
[theorbtwo]: moritz, yes, and we do have a problem anyway.

perl.j: How was PerlMonks made.
Your Mother: perl.j: In six days. The details are fuzzy to this day.
perl.j: Is there a node with some kind of answer?
runrig: Many nodes have some kind of answer
Your Mother: tye is the node with the answer but sadly there is no standard interface.

Xiong: Laugh if you like. My tool is firming up. I feel ready to prematurely release.

thezip: So why do they call it the "God" particle?
thezip: Is that the one that went faster the than speed-of-light a few weeks ago?
Voronich: nope. That was tomorrow.


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