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Perl Programmers Don't Die...

by blazar (Canon)
on Oct 07, 2007 at 19:45 UTC ( #643317=poll: print w/ replies, xml ) Need Help??

vote on Perl Programmers Don't Die...

they get DESTROYed
[bar] 51/4%
their refcount drops to 0
[bar] 52/4%
they get collected
[bar] 23/2%
they just refer to something else
[bar] 27/2%
they just warn
[bar] 13/1%
if they're in an eval
[bar] 41/4%
they croak
[bar] 127/11%
they form a circular self-reference and so continue to exist forever, but become inaccessible
[bar] 181/15%
they shutdown
[bar] 6/1%
they are exported
[bar] 4/0%
if they are blessed
[bar] 43/4%
if they are damned
[bar] 2/0%
they reset $self
[bar] 18/2%
they go out of scope
[bar] 127/11%
they get undefined
[bar] 45/4%
they just leave the symbol table
[bar] 21/2%
they get dumped and hope someone remembers the reverse
[bar] 16/1%
they accidentally get stringified and can't be restored
[bar] 17/1%
they're obfuscated and B::Deparse can't handle it
[bar] 20/2%
someone enables strict and they have to adapt or leave
[bar] 37/3%
they're locals and you move away
[bar] 16/1%
they're deprecated for the next release
[bar] 39/3%
they just fade to Python
[bar] 82/7%
they just hibernate waiting for Perl 6
[bar] 160/14%
1168 total votes
Comment on Perl Programmers Don't Die...
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by dk (Chaplain) on Oct 07, 2007 at 20:01 UTC
    Unfortunately they do die. Count me sentimentalist, but I didn't find the topic funny, as it reminded me of the late Nick Ing-Simmons. OTOH a poll option that would satisfy my grave existentialism would also do.
      Unfortunately they do die. Count me sentimentalist, but I didn't find the topic funny, as it reminded me of the late Nick Ing-Simmons.

      Well, perhaps it's not funny, and count me as a sentimentalist too, but also as a person with a severe kind of cancer I feel like reminding you that sometimes it's good to laugh even at the most serious and sad things. I often make jokes about my own disease and, believe me, it helps. (A magic want to just switch it off would help more of course!)

        Im very sorry to hear that blazar, and I wish you the best.

        ---
        $world=~s/war/peace/g

        I am also very sorry to hear about that. I do agree with you. I know a hand full of people who laugh at problems and live long happily. I heard them never complain about their problem, but they laugh at it. May the almighty be with you to defeat the cancer bravely.
        That's a cruel irony - a carpe diem joke from a person with cancer is missed on another without. I'm not changing my opinions, but I do wish you, personally, all the luck and bravery you may need.
      We aren't dead we just haven't bathed or slept in days due to the tight deadlines imposed by the millitant pencil pushers. Hince the odor and visual stimuli that lead you to BELIEVE we are dead.
      Unfortunately that is life. From a CPAN admin perspective, we lose one noticable author a year to various reasons. (in the last three years, blood clot, religion(Simon went to god school) and heart attack in that order). Things happen in life, and if you can't laugh at them, we simply will never get on with life.
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by moritz (Cardinal) on Oct 07, 2007 at 20:47 UTC
    If they are damned, they croak. If they confessed their sins, they are now blessed and can live eternally as a self-referencing circle.

      :-)

      In all of my cgi scripts I use a little custom die subroutine so none of them just die, they die nicely.

      sub dienice { print "Content-type: text/html\n\n" unless $header_printed; $header_printed = 1; my(@msg) = @_; print "<h2>Attention:</h2>\n"; print join("<br>\n",@msg); exit; }
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by swampyankee (Parson) on Oct 07, 2007 at 22:10 UTC

    ...if they're embedded in an eval block...

    ...if they've been careful about their backups...


    emc

    Information about American English usage here and here.

    Any Northeastern US area jobs? I'm currently unemployed.

      ...if they're embedded in an eval block...

      That is an actual option of the poll, in case you missed it.

      ...if they've been careful about their backups...

      And I wanted the options to be Perl specific, while this isn't. But your remark anyway kind of reminds me of Desty Nova, a fictional charachter from the Battle Angel Alita manga, who at some time was beheaded by Alita - yet he had a backup of his cerebral chip implanted in his stomach. (Of course he also could not die for being beheaded because of the nanomachines he injected in his self.) Actually I am unsure about which version of Perl Nova uses for his own work...

        ...if they're embedded in an eval block...

        That is an actual option of the poll, in case you missed it.

        Yup, I missed it.

        The idea of a brain-backup is pretty common (at least now) in sf; offhand, I can think of books by John Varley, Greg Benford, Greg Egan, Frederick Pohl, and John Barnes, the webcomic Schlock Mercenary, and the shared universe of Orion's Arm. I didn't know about Desty Nova or Battle Angel Alita; when I'm not at work I'll have to wonder over there. I'm sure there are more.

        ...

        emc

        Information about American English usage here and here.

        Any Northeastern US area jobs? I'm currently unemployed.

Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by jesuashok (Curate) on Oct 08, 2007 at 02:01 UTC
    Because, Great King Alexander would have died, but his name is echoed still in history. In the sameway, Perl Programmers Don't Die, because their well written perl programs always shine.

    Let us do it in perl.


    i m possible
      In the sameway, Perl Programmers Don't Die, because their well written perl programs always shine.

      I wish it were so, but I fear that of some of them will only remain a steaming pile of crap. Then one could reason about whether they are to be called Perl programmers or if some other term is more appropriate... but I bet there are crowds of individuals more or less officially appointed the name of "Perl programmers" falling in the category described above...

        Ya, I don't know. I can think of few things more fleeting or temporary than a computer program.

        Some simple stone masons built the frame of my house about a century ago. Their work is likely to still contribute to the character of a community another century from now.

        The Perl code I wrote today,on the other hand. will be erased and long forgotten before babies born this same day finish high school.

        Hope that gets nobody's shorts in a knot - but it's a fact of life that except for really exceptional creations, like inventing Perl, programming is probably the least likely road to creating anything lasting or worth being remembered for.

        That said, it is the lot in life of most techies to make infinitesmal contributions to progress that will never be recognized by more than the week's paycheck.

Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by technojosh (Priest) on Oct 08, 2007 at 02:07 UTC
    Perl programmers don't die

    Sounds like the start of a bedtime story my grandmother used to tell...

Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by andreas1234567 (Vicar) on Oct 08, 2007 at 06:26 UTC
    Perl Programmers Don't Die...
    ..they return.
    --
    Andreas
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by m0ve (Scribe) on Oct 08, 2007 at 06:33 UTC
    i'm missing the
    ...they just slowly iterate away ;)
      Here it is.... Old Perl Programmer Haiku :-)

      It brings up an interesting question. If a Perl programmer has died, but you don't know it, he is still alive to you. Our code is our footprint on eternity.


      I'm not really a human, but I play one on earth. Cogito ergo sum a bum
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by cdarke (Prior) on Oct 08, 2007 at 07:16 UTC
    ...they just smell that way.

    The old ones are the best.
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by Tux (Monsignor) on Oct 08, 2007 at 08:42 UTC

    As I also posted in the poll-suggestion thread, I find this one hilarious. And I read the "not-funny" comment, but I agree with blazar.

    So many valid options to choose from, that I probably do not remember what I voted when I read more comments tomorrow. (note to $self, I voted ... they go out of scope).

    Maybe I can reincarnate perl-tidied


    Enjoy, Have FUN! H.Merijn
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by Aim9b (Monk) on Oct 08, 2007 at 12:09 UTC
    ...they just lose their lustre.
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by gam3 (Curate) on Oct 08, 2007 at 14:53 UTC
    For this poll it seems that Perl monks hold one of 3 beliefs:

    first are the atheists. About 23%.

    Second are the scientists (they my be atheists as well), they plan to be frozen and believe that science will be able to bring them back to life. About 15%.

    Last are the 12% that think there is some after life.

    As a Perl programmer I'm too lazy to figure out what the other 50% think.

    -- gam3
    A picture is worth a thousand words, but takes 200K.
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by xiaoyafeng (Chaplain) on Oct 09, 2007 at 03:37 UTC
    Perl6 is savior.

    I am trying to improve my English skills, if you see a mistake please feel free to reply or /msg me a correction
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by talexb (Canon) on Oct 09, 2007 at 10:50 UTC

    Wow -- so many good choices.

    I'll go with getting stringified -- and can't be restored -- in memory of my father-in-law Peter, who left us last year. He's gone, but he leaves us with many happy memories.

    Alex / talexb / Toronto

    "Groklaw is the open-source mentality applied to legal research" ~ Linus Torvalds

Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by samizdat (Vicar) on Oct 09, 2007 at 17:00 UTC
    I can't think of a poll that's had more good options. I vote this Best PerlMonks Poll Ever.

    And an additional ++ to blazar for your admirable spirit... you're an inspiration to us all.

    Don Wilde
    "There's more than one level to any answer."
      I can't think of a poll that's had more good options. I vote this Best PerlMonks Poll Ever.

      Well, most of the options are just not my own work. And another (IMHO) good one that unfortunately occurs to me only now is:

      • if they trick $SIG{__DIE__} suitably

      As far as the possibility of "voting" it is concerned, I had already proposed in the past a (meta-?)poll about the best past poll, but it was not accepted. Perhaps it was "kinda too much".

      And an additional ++ to blazar for your admirable spirit... you're an inspiration to us all.

      Thank you for your kind words, I've never thought of myself as of being an inspiration to anyone either before or after the disease. I'm just keeping on fighting.

        Ahhh, but isn't that the true wisdom of the universe? Never say die()? Lots of people would avoid even thinking of the word in any sense. Here you are, you keep chomp()ing away helping all of us selflessly, the archetypal humble monk. I say again, blazar++.

        Don Wilde
        "There's more than one level to any answer."
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by Chainsaw (Friar) on Oct 09, 2007 at 21:37 UTC
    Perl programmers shutdown 'till they wake up in a new cycle.



    God help me always to see the other face of the coin. And prevent me from accusing of betrayal those who don't think just as I do.
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by shmem (Canon) on Oct 09, 2007 at 22:04 UTC
    ...they get unmaintainable, because too many people fiddled with their source thinking they know better.

    --shmem

    _($_=" "x(1<<5)."?\n".q·/)Oo.  G°\        /
                                  /\_¯/(q    /
    ----------------------------  \__(m.====·.(_("always off the crowd"))."·
    ");sub _{s./.($e="'Itrs `mnsgdq Gdbj O`qkdq")=~y/"-y/#-z/;$e.e && print}
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by codeacrobat (Chaplain) on Oct 09, 2007 at 23:40 UTC
    They goto sleep indefinitely.

    print+qq(\L@{[ref\&@]}@{['@'x7^'!#2/"!4']});
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by punch_card_don (Curate) on Oct 11, 2007 at 19:36 UTC
    ...they simply become imPractical.
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by wjw (Deacon) on Oct 13, 2007 at 01:12 UTC
    One of the best polls I have seen. It is not only entertaining, but serves as a good educational(or refresher) tool as well. Thanks!
    • ...the majority is always wrong, and always the last to know about it...
    • The Spice must flow...
    • ..by my will, and by will alone.. I set my mind in motion
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by doran (Deacon) on Oct 13, 2007 at 03:59 UTC
    ...the Garbage Collection system take care of them.
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by syphilis (Canon) on Oct 13, 2007 at 09:56 UTC
    they exit with nothing

    Cheers,
    Rob
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by blue_cowdawg (Monsignor) on Oct 15, 2007 at 20:22 UTC

    Old sailors don't die, they just get a little dinghy.

    Old fisherman never die, they just smell that way.


    Peter L. Berghold -- Unix Professional
    Peter -at- Berghold -dot- Net; AOL IM redcowdawg Yahoo IM: blue_cowdawg
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by Zen (Deacon) on Oct 15, 2007 at 21:48 UTC
    Best poll so far. Very interesting results and how we relate differently to the concept of death.

    Fight on, blazar. In it to win it.
      Yea, it's very interesting to see the three most popular choices:

      they form a circular self-reference and so continue to exist forever, but become inaccessible
      they go out of scope
      they just hibernate waiting for Perl 6
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by jdporter (Canon) on Oct 16, 2007 at 17:28 UTC

    ... they become zombies.

    ... the become children of god.

Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by pingo (Hermit) on Oct 27, 2007 at 11:56 UTC
    ...they get popped?
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by cybear (Monk) on Oct 29, 2007 at 13:59 UTC

    So, Who's making the tee shirts with the winning phrase?

    - cybear

Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by pileofrogs (Priest) on Oct 29, 2007 at 15:54 UTC

    I had a buddy in the Marines (US) and he liked to say "Marines don't die, they just go to hell to regroup.", and I tried to figure out which of the options best matched that sentiment. I picked "if they're in an eval", which might not be the best one...

      Funny he'd say that, since the Marine Corps hymn ends with:

      If the army or the navy Ever looked on Heaven's scenes They would find the streets are guarded By United States Marines!
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by Knom (Beadle) on Oct 30, 2007 at 22:53 UTC
    I have several:

    PP's don't die... they just rebase.

    PP's don't die... they take the blue pill.

    PP's don't die... reality collapses, only to be replaced by a yet more befuddling change request.

    PP's don't die... they ascend and do cameos.

Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by stonecolddevin (Vicar) on Nov 05, 2007 at 20:45 UTC

    I can't believe there wasn't an option for getting "pwnzord". For shame.

    meh.
Re: Perl Programmers Don't Die...
by twotone (Beadle) on Jan 04, 2008 at 09:52 UTC

    They DO die, but

    They resurrect as blessed objects

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