|The First Letter of Erudil
to the Monasterians
1Erudil, a hacker of Perl,
To Vroom, the saints, and all the dwellers of the Monastery:
2Mercy, peace and love be yours in abundance.
3It is now a little more than two years
since I joined this community of believers in Perl,
and my appreciation of this place and its custodians and members
continues to grow.
4Brothers and sisters, I beseech you to continue
fighting the good fight, showing patience and understanding
to those who come to the gates of our blessed Monastery,
bereft of clues and ignorant of our ways.
5Do not rebuke them with harsh words such as "RTFM",
but rather lead them gently - with URLs - so that they may
6Suffer the newbies to come unto us, instructing them of
the many truths contained within the good book.
7For who among us has never been in a state of error
8Consider carefully the following:
9Blessed are they that "use strict;",
for their typos shall be caught before trouble arises.
10Blessed are they that use "-w",
for Perl itself shall show them the error of their ways.
11Blessed are they that "use CGI;",
for their parameters shall be passed without error.
12Blessed are they that use CPAN,
for exceedingly large shall be the number of wheels that
they do not re-invent.
13Blessed are they that understand regexs,
for they shall waste no time trying to parse HTML.
14Blessed are you, when "they" insult you
and ridicule you, and speak all manner of evil against you
for using Perl,
for great will be your reward when your project is finished
in less time, and with less effort.
15If there are those who refuse to accept our wonderful
message, do not allow them to draw you into a fruitless flame war,
and thereby bring disrepute upon yourselves and our Monastery.
16Remember well: "What should it profit a man, if he should
win a flame war, yet lose his cool?".
17If this is an area of weakness for you, as it is for me,
then I would encourage you, my fellow Monasterians, to consider a vow of
silence as I have done, speaking rarely and with words carefully chosen
to edify and inform.a
18Brothers and sisters, I commend you once again for
restoring my faith in the idea of a viable, on-line community.
19May your syntax always be correct and your algorithms
20May your references point to good data,
and may you grow in the knowledge and understanding of our beloved language,
21Amen and amen.
a 17 Some early manuscripts do not have verse 17
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