#!/usr/bin/perl
use warnings;
use strict;
use Lingua::EN::Tagger;

my %fragments;
my $p          = new Lingua::EN::Tagger;
my @adjectives = qw/nervous nutty obnoxious outrageous
  panicky repulsive scary selfish sore
  tense terrible testy thoughtless tired
  troubled upset uptight weary wicked worried/;
my @stems = (
	"It's been said that there were many",
	'Goldfish spoke with',
	'There were three',
	'People used to see 42',
	'There were quietly-roaming groups of'
);

while ( my $line = <DATA> ) {
	chomp $line;
	my $adjective = $adjectives[ int rand $#adjectives + 1 ];
	$line = $p->add_tags($line) =~ s/<nns>/$adjective /gr =~ s/<.+?>//gr;
	my @words = split / /, $line;
	for my $i ( 0 .. $#words - 1 ) {
		push @{ $fragments{ $words[$i] } },
		  join ' ', @words[ 0 .. $i - 1, $i + 1 .. $#words ];
	}
}

print "Once upon a time...\n\n";

my @sentences;

for my $term ( keys %fragments ) {
	my $stem = $stems[ int rand $#stems + 1 ];
	push @sentences, "$stem $term "
	  . ( join ' and ', @{ $fragments{$term} } ) . '.';
}

print join ' ', @sentences;

print "\n\nThe times have certainly changed.\n\nThe end.";

__DATA__
big businesses
fast red cars
big smart companies
fast light planes
fast animals
big bad wolves
small bad girls
bad growling bears