use warnings; use strict; @,=unpack"C*","mG\e:*\cZM\b?~O\xf".
This is a nicer variant of Re^2: Polynomial JAPH (golf?) using a simple idea from Japh algebra.
Non-existent; I don't have TV
Non-existent; my TV doesn't have/need a remote
Under my control; I watch alone
Under the control of whoever shouts loudest
Under the control of whoever gets it first
One of many, and the TV has a mind of its own
Results (548 votes),