perldoc perlfaq1 | perl -ne '/((?<=")(.+hack...(?:OR)?))/&&die$2.$/' -
See also One-liner japh, Just Another JAPH, Opere Citato Japh, and JAPF for the same idea (some of these only work with older versions of perl though).
My fellow monks
Can't tell (I'm NSA/FBI/HS/...)
Others (explain your deviation)
Results (101 votes). Check out past polls.