Your skill will accomplish
what the force of many cannot
Well, I'm not at all excited about Perl6.
Bah humbug! Come on scrooge, get in the spirit of things. Perl 6 is going to kick some serious ass, it might even be as good as Python! Better yet, we get Parrot, so I can compile my Python, Ruby, and Perl 6 code to Parrot bytecode! Then I can compile the Parrot bytecode to an executable! World peace can't be that far behind!
whether it ever will get an acceptable speed.
This is Perl, speed doesn't matter. If I wanted speed I'd write in ASM! I want rapid development, I want portability, I want all things Perly. Gimmie Gimmie Gimmie!
Besides, they'll be workarounds for all speed problems - if a feature is too slow just don't use it (you don't use the pre-match and post-match variables, do you? - I can't even remember what they are!). And that's not even that much of a concern because, just like food, everything ends up the same in the end.
Most new things I don't care about
Yeah, what do us real programmers need all these flashy gizmos for? The only language you need is binary. Just give me a keyboard with giant '1' and '0' buttons and I'll be able to whip up anything! Kids these days, sheesh.
It's hard to pick a favourite thing.
Atta monk! So many good things it's hard to choose, I know. Kinda like easter, you got those chocolate bunnies, and then those cadbury eggs with that sweet, sweet white and yellow filling. They also have those mini-eggs, have you seen those? Then there's the marshmellow eggs, the malt chocolate ones, and even those caramilk ones. Mmmmmm... Chocolatey Perl goodness...
and I mourn the loss of some things.
Do not let your heart be troubled. Go now, and rest, for you are weary with toil and much sorrow. Tonight you shall sleep in peace. Tomorrow you shall rise and see that Perl 6 does not mean the end of Perl 5, for much maintenance work will be required for years to come. I also see, in the not so distant future, a light on the horizon. It marks the coming of a Perl 5 - Parrot compiler which shall prove to be the end of your troubles.
My favourite thing is probably the Pythonish way of dealing with subroutine parameters.
True Dat. Personally when I saw the Parrot april fools joke I couldn't have been happier (they got me goood). I still think a Perl-Python merger would bring balance to the force, but unfortunately few seek comprimise.
Anyhow, I have a strange craving for cadbury mini-eggs, I'll see you all later.