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Name thyself, perl hacker

by Tardis (Pilgrim)
on May 29, 2002 at 12:05 UTC ( #170050=perlmeditation: print w/replies, xml ) Need Help??


Here's something a little bit different. I started my current job quite a few months ago, yet I still don't have any business cards. This must be amended!

Now my bosses, being agreeable types (and hacker friendly), tell me I can put whatever I like on my business card, as long as I'm prepared to a) live with it and b) live up to it.

So now the question is, what do I call myself?

Anyone else have any perl-related self-inflicted job titles they could share? My general areas of competency are in perl and DBMS (PostgreSQL). I'm no Merlyn, but I'm no rank amatuer either.

So what shall it be? Have some fun, give me some ideas, but think to youself - would you have it on your business card? Because if you wouldn't, probably neither will I :-)

Replies are listed 'Best First'.
Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by Beatnik (Parson) on May 29, 2002 at 12:19 UTC
    I'd go for something like
    Hendrik Van Belleghem Perl Hacker
    Hendrik Van Belleghem #!/usr/bin/perl
    other options...
    1. Perl Addict
    2. use strict; #damnit!
    3. Perl Monk
    4. Programmer of an Eclectic Rubbish Language

    ... Quidquid perl dictum sit, altum viditur.

      3. Perl Monk

      That sounds like it'd really roll off the business card nice and smooth. I like it!

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by broquaint (Abbot) on May 29, 2002 at 12:20 UTC
    How about ...
    • Just another Perl Hacker,
    • Not Just another Perl Hacker,
    • Perl Grokmeister
    • Tardis - PhD, PimB, JaPH
    • Perl Guru cum SQL Ninja
    • Cross-dimensional time-travelling phone box at your service sir



Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by ariels (Curate) on May 29, 2002 at 12:35 UTC
    I suppose that
    my $self = shift;
    is out of the question?
      That's really, really tempting...

      It might go over a few too many heads though - and I shudder to think of how the printing company might mangle it :-)

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by Biker (Priest) on May 29, 2002 at 13:03 UTC

    Add your PGP fingerprint to the card.

    Everything went worng, just as foreseen.

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by andreychek (Parson) on May 29, 2002 at 16:51 UTC
    Eric Jacobsen went to work for Intel on the condition that his title be called "Minister of Algorithms". I've always been a bit envious of a title like that :-)

    You could try something like:
  • Minister of Perl
  • Minister of Regular Expressions

    or even

  • Minister of Foo

    Good luck :-)

    Lucy: "What happens if you practice the piano for 20 years and then end up not being rich and famous?"
    Schroeder: "The joy is in the playing."
Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by maverick (Curate) on May 29, 2002 at 15:16 UTC
    Some of the better humorous ones I've heard have been
    • Lord High Breaker (head of Q/A)
    • Grand Visor of Machinations (one of eduardo's titles)
    • Chief Peon (over all the other Peons)

    I actually prefer serious titles given that I usually have to talk to clients, etc.

    • Programmer
    • Lead Systems Analyst
    • Senior Developer
    They describe the job, not the tools and don't require an explination when you give someone your card :)

    If you need a semi-serious one how about 'Perl / RDBMS Developer'?

    OmG! They killed tilly! You *bleep*!!

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by cLive ;-) (Prior) on May 29, 2002 at 12:54 UTC
    I always liked the word Imagineer...


    cLive ;-)


      For those who may not be aware, "Imagineer" is a portmanteau word coined by Walt Disney. It's the name of the division at Disney that designs rides, attractions, and other goodies. It may be trademarked, I'm not sure. But I don't think they'd take kindly to you putting it on your own business card....

        Arggghhh. no! Don't get sucked in by the devil! :) Imagineer is also a magazine, a software company, a japanese digital information publisher amongst many other things.

        Being a brit I know nothing about the Disney thing, Sigh, another word lost, just like when McDonalds called their take-aways "restaurants" (I see no waiter?).


        cLive ;-)


Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by newrisedesigns (Curate) on May 29, 2002 at 14:29 UTC

    $self{occupation} = "thinker";


    regular expression handler, database rangler


    I always wear a tie()

    John J Reiser

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by delegatrix (Scribe) on May 29, 2002 at 19:18 UTC
    I like serious job titles. I feel a bit funny handing the CIO of the Justice Dept a card that says 'Perl Grrl'.

    My card says Senior Internet Technology Architect, but I'm thinking of changing to Senior Internet Technology Strategist for the next printing.

    I also wouldn't want a job title that was tech-specific, like Perl Hacker, XML Guru, etc. I like more generic ones, like Software Engineer.

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by Aristotle (Chancellor) on May 29, 2002 at 15:31 UTC
    I'm too uncreative to come up with something of my own, but refining what others have proposed, for a stylish one you could try use DBI; - or maybe $ perl -MDBI (I really like that latter one :-) ). On the other hand, for a real business card you should use a serious title, or at least put it there in addition. If you don't want it to be really boring but serious enough to give a client, you might try something like Database Craftsman.

    Makeshifts last the longest.

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by jplindstrom (Monsignor) on May 29, 2002 at 20:29 UTC
    I actually got away with my current business card title "Sourcerer" by not asking anyone. That's a good strategy for unimportant things like titles :)

    The downside: in crowds like this it is waay too pretentious and borderline embarrasing, considering how little I really know. But, hey, at work they don't know how little I know :)

    If I would change title, I'd probably go for something like "Perl Jammer".


Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by metadoktor (Hermit) on May 29, 2002 at 17:51 UTC
    How about:

    Edward Blackadder
    Perl Adept


    Edward Blackadder


    "The doktor is in."

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by perrin (Chancellor) on May 29, 2002 at 14:19 UTC
    Lord of All He Surveys
Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by marvell (Pilgrim) on May 29, 2002 at 16:35 UTC
    Surely, it has to be "Just Another Perl Hacker".

    ¤ Steve Marvell

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by Jenda (Abbot) on May 29, 2002 at 23:00 UTC

    To put several suggestions together:
      Paul Tardis
      Chief Sourcerer
      Department of Regular Expressions
      Paul Tardis
      Department of Regular Expressions


Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by Rex(Wrecks) (Curate) on May 30, 2002 at 03:36 UTC
    I had a QA Manager use "Pest Control" (bug squasher), which of course promted a QA Engineer to choose "Pest" :) I have also seen "Digital Entomologist", "Tall Blond Guy", "Bug Sniper", "Natural Born Coder", and a host of others.

    Personally I have always been "NetMage", except the one time I was allowed to use Klingon Fonts, then I was still "NetMage" but in a totally cool, unintelligible font :)

    "Nothing is sure but death and taxes" I say combine the two and its death to all taxes!
(wil) Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by wil (Priest) on May 30, 2002 at 10:07 UTC
    The job title Perl Junkie has always raised a few eyebrows, especially from folks who don't know what Perl is :-)

    - wil
Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by rattusillegitimus (Friar) on May 30, 2002 at 19:06 UTC

    A former supervisor, with serious delusions of grandeur, dubbed his lead developers Dread Lords. We were well on our way to global conquest and having business cards printed when the company folded and we were all laid off.


Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by dthacker (Deacon) on May 29, 2002 at 21:27 UTC
    My company email sig, which I hope to get on my cards at next printing.

    DBA, SysAdmin, Postmaster, Odd Jobs


    Code On!
Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by jlongino (Parson) on May 29, 2002 at 22:26 UTC
    How about:
    • $foo{meister};
    • Perl Minion
    • Torquemada de Perl


Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by thelenm (Vicar) on May 31, 2002 at 16:28 UTC
    My business cards say "Super Genius"... not that I live up to that, but I'm a Wile E. Coyote fan. :-)


Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by BUU (Prior) on May 29, 2002 at 18:09 UTC
    It should just say "Perl", On one side, and the other side have your name.
Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by dsheroh (Monsignor) on May 31, 2002 at 17:07 UTC
    In my last life, we were told to pick our own titles when we got business cards. I told them to put "Software Geek" on mine.

    When I received the cards, they said "Programmer". :p

Re: Name thyself, perl hacker
by BUU (Prior) on May 30, 2002 at 02:29 UTC
    Better, idea, on the front (in the obligatory large mono black font) P.S.H.A.D. (or any other random array of letters), then when someone asks, make up something witty along the lines of "The job that has no pronouceable acronym" or what not, or just look mysterious.

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