I'm not saying load balancers are a kludge. You are putting words were there weren't. Things like mod_proxy are, since they are slow. I've seen them implemented and they just require an extra load.
You don't create monolithic objects. You create containers. That's like complaining ArrayList is monolithic because you put a bunch of Integer objects in it. You create a DTO object whch contains everything you will need and one method that'd contains the returned objects in some organized fasion.
I'm also saying, dont let certain parts go rotten. I'm saying some parts will require resources beyond that of others. You seperate them out.
But you see, that's the problem with life. Sometimes B will be over loaded and slow w/o extra resources, and there isn't much you can do about it. It's life. But when those things get hit, they could slow down the entire service as a whole. You know the varios costs of things beofre hand and by seperating them out, you are prepared to allocate new resources to them when needed.
Play that funky music white boy..