When I die, I will...

Replies are listed 'Best First'.
Re: When I die, I will... by pajout (Curate) on Jul 01, 2011 at 11:45 UTC
be caught by eval {}	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by toolic (Bishop) on Jul 01, 2011 at 13:37 UTC
It's good to plan ahead... `BEGIN { *CORE::GLOBAL::die = sub {print "I am immortal!!\n"} }` [download]	[reply] [d/l]
Re: When I die, I will... by ChuckularOne (Prior) on Jul 01, 2011 at 12:42 UTC
Throw an undocumented error	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by cdarke (Prior) on Jul 04, 2011 at 08:36 UTC
...have on my gravestone: "It is now safe to turn off your computer". Although knowing my luck it'll be stuck on: "Please wait while your computer shuts down" SIGKILL, please, someone...	[reply] [d/l] [select]
Re: When I die, I will... by kcott (Archbishop) on Jul 02, 2011 at 00:41 UTC
Load a previously saved game. -- Ken	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by JavaFan (Canon) on Jul 04, 2011 at 10:15 UTC
The universe will end the moment I die. All of you only exist in my imagination. But there will be free pizza if I turn out to be wrong.	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by zentara (Cardinal) on Jul 01, 2011 at 18:21 UTC
I will ... probably start stinking in a few days if you don't bury me, but what the f* do I care, I'm going to Krishnaloka. TGIF :-) I'm not really a human, but I play one on earth. Old Perl Programmer Haiku ................... flash japh	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by BrowserUk (Patriarch) on Jul 04, 2011 at 10:35 UTC
When I die, I ~~will~~ won't ...	[reply]
Re^2: When I die, I will... by sshringa (Initiate) on Jul 23, 2011 at 09:55 UTC
like :)	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by blue_cowdawg (Monsignor) on Jul 07, 2011 at 14:00 UTC
I am a sailor and a fisherman, there are two appropriate replies: Old Sailors never die, they just get a little dinghy. Old Fishermen never die, they just smell that way. Peter L. Berghold -- Unix Professional Peter -at- Berghold -dot- Net; AOL IM redcowdawg Yahoo IM: blue_cowdawg	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by Anonymous Monk on Jul 01, 2011 at 10:27 UTC
wake up and restart the simulation	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by Ratazong (Monsignor) on Jul 01, 2011 at 11:16 UTC
(x) other (see Old Perl Programmer Haiku - with many kudos to zentara)	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by Anonymous Monk on Jul 07, 2011 at 19:58 UTC
Become a zombie, unless my parent process waits on me!	[reply]
Re^2: When I die, I will... by monoi (Initiate) on Jul 07, 2011 at 21:09 UTC
Ah, but what if your parent has set `$SIG{'CHLD'} = 'IGNORE';`?	[reply] [d/l]
Re: When I die, I will... by Tux (Canon) on Jul 01, 2011 at 13:58 UTC
I plan to release all my gained energy and haunt all the people I love to receive some of that back, either as knowledge or as motivation or love. One has to believe in something, and I do not believe in (any form of) God. Enjoy, Have FUN! H.Merijn	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by fishy (Friar) on Jul 06, 2011 at 19:25 UTC
`foreach (@life) { new $life and die; }`	[reply] [d/l]
Re: When I die, I will... by thezip (Vicar) on Jul 09, 2011 at 19:54 UTC
reprogram all elevator music with my own personal mix. What can be asserted without proof can be dismissed without proof. - Christopher Hitchens	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by davido (Cardinal) on Jul 01, 2011 at 18:37 UTC
`$SIG{__DIE__} = sub { print "All your base are belong to us!"; }` Dave	[reply] [d/l]
Re: When I die, I will... by Tuppis (Initiate) on Jul 02, 2011 at 01:30 UTC
Cannot compute.	[reply]
Re^2: When I die, I will... by Don Coyote (Hermit) on Jul 02, 2011 at 20:02 UTC
`until(&time){ print "hello, hello, This is $deadme please don't switch + off the computer I appear to have rematerialised in ram"; } sub time{ my $revival = eval ($today() + rnd(($year()+5)-($year()+1))); return $revival; }` [download]	[reply] [d/l]
Re: When I die, I will... by stonecolddevin (Parson) on Jul 13, 2011 at 14:51 UTC
I'll cross the Rainbow Bridge to reunite with my best friend and partner in crime, Kross Kross, and head on over to the Elysian Fields to play fetch and practice Kung Fu. I feel like that's a pretty good way to spend eternity, whether ideologies were crossed or not. Three thousand years of beautiful tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax, you're god damn right I'm living in the fucking past	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by moggs (Sexton) on Jul 18, 2011 at 16:33 UTC
It's the conclusion of my algorithm for life: Born Loop: Some days are good Some days are bad Repeat until dead	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by mertserger (Curate) on Jul 03, 2011 at 18:04 UTC
go to the Fields of Reeds after having made the Negative Confessions. After all my username is Ancient Egyptian	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by perl.j (Pilgrim) on Jul 12, 2011 at 23:05 UTC
Hate to be a party pooper but aren't most of you guys religious? If so I would think your answer would be Go To Heaven.	[reply]
Re^2: When I die, I will... by luis.roca (Deacon) on Jul 12, 2011 at 23:12 UTC
"Hate to be a party pooper but aren't most of you guys religious?" The Monastery is pretty diverse in that regard. See: Religion in the Monastery. for a sampling of members' views. "...the adversities born of well-placed thoughts should be considered mercies rather than misfortunes." � Don Quixote	[reply]
Re^2: When I die, I will... by soniamdisappoint (Initiate) on Jul 19, 2011 at 02:56 UTC
That would kinda imply using a "goto". Good practice would be "use afterlife; &heaven". Just Another Perl, Python, Ruby and C hacker.	[reply]
Re^3: When I die, I will... by jdporter (Paladin) on Jul 19, 2011 at 14:05 UTC
No no no. The modern, structured replacement for GOTO (long jump) is exceptions. `while(1) { # eternal ... if ( -T _ ) { # terminal. yuk yuk die "OUTAHERE"; # or croak } }` [download] I reckon we are the only monastery ever to have a dungeon stuffed with 16,000 zombies.	[reply] [d/l]
Re^3: When I die, I will... by cdarke (Prior) on Jul 19, 2011 at 12:40 UTC
But that would imply a return... or maybe `goto &heaven` containing an infinite loop? So death is just a form of AUTOLOAD.	[reply] [d/l]
Re: When I die, I will... by Arunbear (Prior) on Jul 18, 2011 at 12:34 UTC
Get stuck in a love-testing machine (line 1207). Updated Fixed broken link (2017-04-13)	[reply]
Re^2: When I die, I will... by chacham (Prior) on Apr 13, 2017 at 07:14 UTC
That link does not seem to work (anymore). I assume it refers to The Simpsons Spin-Off Showcase where "The second is The Love-matic Grampa, a sitcom featuring Moe Szyslak who receives dating advice from Abraham Simpson, whose ghost is possessing a love testing machine."	[reply]
Re^3: When I die, I will... by Arunbear (Prior) on Apr 13, 2017 at 09:27 UTC
Thanks, yes it is that one. I've replaced the link with a snapshot from the Internet Archive.	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by Anonymous Monk on Jul 11, 2011 at 17:34 UTC
Mississippi John Hurt had a good idea: "When my earthly trials are over, carry my body out in the sea. Save all the undertaker bills, let the mermaids flirt with me."	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by SeigePerlous (Novice) on Jul 25, 2011 at 15:50 UTC
...merge with Agent Smith, effectively restarting the machine mainframe creating the 7th incarnation of the Matrix.	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by Anonymous Monk on Jul 12, 2011 at 13:52 UTC
Error 1321 Error 1321. Windows has insufficient priviledges to delete "user". please log on as "user" or contact "user"!	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by jozef (Sexton) on Jul 20, 2011 at 09:28 UTC
When I (physical me) die, I (spiritual me) will continue to live in thoughts, dreams and memories of those people I spoke to, influenced or taught something worth thinking, dreaming or remembering about.	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by Anonymous Monk on Jul 06, 2011 at 14:01 UTC
will give error Process Terminated!!! Reboot again...	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by stevieb (Canon) on Apr 13, 2017 at 13:20 UTC
Be haunted by the bugs in my code that I didn't have time to fix.	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by woosley (Beadle) on Jul 20, 2011 at 05:02 UTC
become a zombie because no one cases...	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by wjw (Priest) on Apr 13, 2017 at 10:31 UTC
Actually I think I will go to heaven and merge with the universe, which are about the same thing to me. But then I have my own belief system which is itself a merge between Protestant upbringing and Science. I don't see the two as mutually exclusive. ...the majority is always wrong, and always the last to know about it... A solution is nothing more than a clearly stated problem... wjw	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by Anonymous Monk on Jul 13, 2011 at 07:24 UTC
definitely be reborn according to what i did.	[reply]
Re: When I die, I will... by Anonymous Monk on Jul 25, 2011 at 14:19 UTC
exec $0;	[reply]


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When I die, I will...

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