sub ruhroh { @_ = map { my @words = split(/\s/); foreach my $word (@words) { $word =~ s/^([aeiou])/r$1/ and next; $word =~ s/^([AEIOU])/'R' . lc($1)/e and next; $word =~ s/^[a-z][^aeiou]?/r/ and next; $word =~ s/^[A-Z][^aeiou]?/R/; } join(' ', @words); } @_; push @_, ', Raggy!'; goto &croak; }