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Friends in unusual places

by Zecho (Hermit)
on Sep 15, 2001 at 16:56 UTC ( #112622=perlmeditation: print w/replies, xml ) Need Help??

There's not really a section for this so I'm posting it here.

Some of you have not heard, but my step-sister was in a terrible auto accident, and she's barely holding on to life. She's 22 and has two children. one of which was hurt pretty badly himself. To help ease my mind, I came here to chat and see what's been posted recently.

Something happened that night that I never expected to find at perlmonks, everyone was offering their support and their prayers for Lisa and the kids, and each time I have signed on since, they are quick to inquire about her progress. Every time someone asks about her, it brings tears to my eyes, just knowing that they genuinely care.

Even though I've only been a member here for ~1 month, I feel like I have gained some true friends.. the encouragement I get from you guys helps keep me on the positive side.

If ever there is something I can do to repay your generosity, don't hesitate to ask. Though I don't think there's much I could do that could repay the amount of good I have received.

Last I heard was that Lisa's condition has slightly improved, despite major internal damages, her prognosis gets better by the hour it seems and hopefully will return to her normal life within a few months.

I can't say it enough
Thank you!

Replies are listed 'Best First'.
Re: Friends in unusual places
by footpad (Abbot) on Sep 15, 2001 at 21:34 UTC

    Like the others, I also hope for her speedy and complete recovery

    I agree; the Monastery is more than a place to pick up a syntax tricks or a quick FAQ. It's a community of like-mined people, generally devoted to helping each other learn. Personally, I really like that. There are some very real and very decent people. (There are a few other types as well, but we won't go there today.)

    The Offering Plate is a great was to give back and I'm certain that vroom and others appreciate your donation. There might be another avenue to consider as well.

    When I graduated from high school, I basically found myself on the street. The story is long, involved, and boils down to the fact that my mother had "provided" for me until I was 18 and she felt that was enough. G'bye.

    Fortunately, many decent folks gave me space to crash while I worked my way through school. Sometimes, it was a couch and a corner to stash my things. At others, it was a room to let for what I could afford. One time, a family friend of a girlfriend (iow, nearly a complete stranger) paid a large bill for me. This was done freely, without being asked, and with only one string.

    The man, you see, was a medical doctor and had apparently found himself in some straights while he was going to medical school. A complete stranger did a similar favor for him, asking only that--at sometime in the future--he perform a similar generosity for someone else. The doctor then passed the geas (if you will) to me.

    I have no idea if I was his first beneficiary, nor do I know if I was the last. I do know that I have passed it on frequently since then. Plainly, I do many random acts of kindness, many anonymously. In some cases, I've asked my beneficiaries to continue the tradition.

    You see where I'm going with this. One way to repay unexpected generosity is to be unexpectedly generous to someone else. Not a friend, but a complete stranger. Someone you don't know or someone will likely never see again.

    --f, trying to change the world one courtesy at a time...Hokey? You bet. So? It's also true.

      Its funny but this story must have occured time and again. I have had a similer experience and have reacted in a very similer way. The concept of debt that may only be repaid by a reciprocating debt is a very noble debt indeed.

      Also I believe you are correct about the monks here. On that horrible day I said some things that though I believe were 'right' were perhaps inappropriate for the moment. I was convinced that from my chats and my post that I had lost in some way my place (however new I am) amongst the community. And for this was saddend.

      I was however quite wrong. Sure perhaps there are monks that seem not to reply to my CB's anymore, but on the whole the community has in no way rejected me. Indeed it could probably be argued that the community showed more respect for my beliefs and views than I did for their feelings. And for that I give thanks, and wish to send my apologies.

      I am a long way way from home, I dont speak the language of my host country (which I am nevetheless learning to love) and have few opportunities to speak (fluently at least, I am fortunate that many Germans speak English well but there is often a limit) with intelligent people on any of the very many subjects that are discussed here, both in post and chat. For me finding the monastary was to find an electronic equivelent of the cafe near my parents house in Toronto where people of ever level of education, race, colour and creed gathered, primarily in mutual respect and consideration to drink coffee, play chess and discuss the events of the world. For me it is like a little bit of home has been constructed on the net and for that I too give thanks to the monks who have made it such an interesting place to be. I plan to stay an active participant for as long as I am welcome. :-)

      As for paypal, I'm not so sure the European monks would agree that it is that cool. Id like to see an easier way for euromonks to contribute. It looks like it'll be easier to get my parent to donate from TO than me to donate myself from here.

      I think that despite Zecho already being aware of my sentiment I would like to also wish his sister and her children as speedy and full a recovery as can be had.

      You are not ready to use symrefs unless you already know why they are bad. -- tadmc (CLPM)

      Very cool. We recently did a favor when we gave someone a place to stay for awhile. He returned the favor by selling a large quantity of our CDs & DVDs.
      I'm happy to report that I haven't gone totally cynical about people and in some ways, I think Perl Monks has helped me remember for every person that's defective, there are a lot more that give without expecting a return.

      For the last 6 months, my means of helping out finacially has been cut off due to lack of employement, but it has let me do other activities such as volunteer at a local cat shelter.

Re: Friends in unusual places
by Chady (Priest) on Sep 15, 2001 at 19:40 UTC

    You want to repay? why not help keeping this community online and donate?

    and my our prayers to Lisa.

    He who asks will be a fool for five minutes, but he who doesn't ask will remain a fool for life.

    Chady |
      Donation made. (Not that I felt obligated) But because it was a great idea.. Thanks

      Gotta love paypal

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