“Gentlebeings™, puh-leeuze!” This is rather embarrassing.
No matter what a handful of you seem to think about me, or for that matter about your oh-so precious website that has not received a single cosmetic face-lift in a decade, what the OP – and I – am describing, is a trivially-simple thing. (If WikiPedia can do it, so can you.)
Today, all web-sites are expected to be https. (Yes, my own web-site presently “sucks large” too, but this is about to change and in any case it is beside the point.) Certificates are now free, and the necessary changes to nginix or Apache should take all of about twenty minutes. It would take much less time to implement the change than to further discuss it.