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The Humor Thief

by Ovid (Cardinal)
on Mar 12, 2003 at 15:12 UTC ( #242378=perlmeditation: print w/replies, xml ) Need Help??

I like humor. I like it a lot. In fact, I like it so much that I steal just about every joke that I can find. I have no originality. For the purpose of stealing even more jokes, I have to ask: what's the funniest thing you've read here on Perlmonks? (a link would be nice, if you can find the reference.) I've been here for almost three years now and I've read some side-splitting posts. Many monks are new here and haven't seen some of the older stuff. Others have been around longer but may have forgotten (or not seen) that one post you can't help chuckling about. Humor is good and sharing humor is better.

To start things off: in response to a complaint that we were a "board just for propaganda", ichimunki wrote: What do you really think? CGI is some sort of weird Amway we're selling here?.

I've laughed over that one for months.


New address of my CGI Course.
Silence is Evil (feel free to copy and distribute widely - note copyright text)

Replies are listed 'Best First'.
Re: The Humor Thief
by PodMaster (Abbot) on Mar 12, 2003 at 15:51 UTC
    Deep Thoughts are my fave ;)
    <IFRAME SRC="" WI +DTH="500" HEIGHT="200"></IFRAME> <iLAYER src="" WID +TH="500" HEIGHT="200"></iLAYER>
    lzcd(Re: cookies) In life, one discovers a sort of person that, when about to be murdered in a rather slow, painful and quite disgusting manner by a raving launatic, is likely to ask "Excuse me. Do you like Carob?".
    <KM>Hire pixel gnomes to look at all the images.
    <AgentM> crazyinsomniac: ...just four painted, dancing homosexuals?
    <Sherlock> i spotted this in Ovid's latest node: Don't reuse bad does the saying go..."Don't polish a turd" ;)

    And from MeowChow homenode,

    Overheard in the CB shortly after a conversation between crazyinsomniac and myself, regarding the finer points of various digestive waste-products:

    <malaga> msg/crazyinsomniac when i chomp it, it hangs - i'm doing it wrong i'm sure - i'll go try it again
    Tyke hopes that malaga's comment to crazyinsomniac has nothing to do with the excrement conversation

    Dominus as always --

    Also, I once said:

    • Now that's some goood feedass (ass back it's all good) %')
    • I got pointy ones (^)(^)
    • Wow, that must be like an entire metric assload. ** props to redmist for unit of measurement.
    • Have a quart of cgi-gin %-)

    | @ @
    C  _)
      o      "Brussel sprouts are the devils gonads"

    There are tons more, but i'll be damned if i can dig'em up (good thread btw, I like AMMO ;D).

    MJD says you can't just make shit up and expect the computer to know what you mean, retardo!
    I run a Win32 PPM repository for perl 5.6x+5.8x. I take requests.
    ** The Third rule of perl club is a statement of fact: pod is sexy.

Re: The Humor Thief
by Mr. Muskrat (Canon) on Mar 12, 2003 at 15:59 UTC

    These are the two that instantly pop into my head when I think of Perl Monks humor:

    1. stupid

    Edited by the Perl Illuminati

      <!-- The second list item has been removed to protect our secrets. -->

      But there are no Perl Illuminati!



      perl -le 'print+unpack("N",pack("B32","00000000000000000000001000111101"))'

Re: The Humor Thief
by jacques (Priest) on Mar 12, 2003 at 15:20 UTC
Re: The Humor Thief
by derby (Abbot) on Mar 12, 2003 at 15:48 UTC
Re: The Humor Thief
by adrianh (Chancellor) on Mar 12, 2003 at 17:02 UTC

    R0z3z 4r3 R3d made me laugh out loud.

    Then the replies from the guy who didn't get it made me laugh louder.

Re: The Humor Thief
by Hero Zzyzzx (Curate) on Mar 12, 2003 at 17:51 UTC

    While not particularly funny, This node gets me chuckling, mainly because I wonder what the heck is going through Steeeeeeeve's mind, posting perl code that represents a super new encryption algorithm in perl that WON'T EVEN RUN and gets shot down left and right. MeowChow has a couple great replies. . .

    -Any sufficiently advanced technology is
    indistinguishable from doubletalk.

Re: The Humor Thief
by runrig (Abbot) on Mar 12, 2003 at 17:54 UTC
    ybiC has a good collection on his homenode, including and (though its not mentioned that you should also read and's posts), and perrin's self proclaimed best post. I can't take full credit for this node, as my wife came up with the last part (I snorted when I first heard it), and believe it or not it is very (nearly) true.
(jeffa) Re: The Humor Thief
by jeffa (Bishop) on Mar 12, 2003 at 16:49 UTC
    Well, it's not the funniest by far (after all, it's from me), but do you remember this one Ovid? :)


    (the triplet paradiddle with high-hat)

      Yup. I remember that and it was (and still is) pretty darned funny :)

      Now if only we can get the Big Iron folk to appreciate it.


      New address of my CGI Course.
      Silence is Evil (feel free to copy and distribute widely - note copyright text)

Re: The Humor Thief
by AcidHawk (Vicar) on Mar 13, 2003 at 05:47 UTC

    This old node of mine had some really great replies.

    Update: Fixed Link

    Of all the things I've lost in my life, its my mind I miss the most.
Re: The Humor Thief
by Anonymous Monk on Mar 12, 2003 at 16:35 UTC
Re: The Humor Thief
by Rex(Wrecks) (Curate) on Mar 12, 2003 at 18:58 UTC
    My favorite is a CB quote from ChemBoy:

    "Ah, yes. I'm proud to say the idea of doing something that silly hadn't even occurred to me :-)"

    "Nothing is sure but death and taxes" I say combine the two and its death to all taxes!
Re: The Humor Thief
by Anonymous Monk on Mar 13, 2003 at 04:05 UTC
Re: The Humor Thief
by Anonymous Monk on Mar 12, 2003 at 16:23 UTC
Re: The Humor Thief
by l2kashe (Deacon) on Mar 12, 2003 at 17:15 UTC
    Its older, offsite, and about admins as opposed to programmers, but Types of Admins

    /* And the Creator, against his better judgement, wrote man.c */
Re: The Humor Thief
by TStanley (Canon) on Mar 13, 2003 at 12:37 UTC
    japhy posted the original node, but the reply made by footpad is funnier.

    It is God's job to forgive Osama Bin Laden. It is our job to arrange the meeting -- General Norman Schwartzkopf
Re: The Humor Thief
by thelenm (Vicar) on Mar 24, 2003 at 23:41 UTC
Re: The Humor Thief
by Aristotle (Chancellor) on Mar 16, 2003 at 02:16 UTC
    There's a small collection on my home node. I'm particularly fond of a piece of comedy by ignatz (who seems to have a very wry sense of humour in general :) ).

    Makeshifts last the longest.

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