This is my first CUFP. (You have to do something when you get bored at work..) If you have any suggestions, I'm sure you do, feel free. This is sure to be a hit with Sys Admins and BOfH lovers alike. To come in future releases...:
- Automated web-based tech support
- and Bulk-Eraser function:
print "You would like more space?";
print "What did you say your username was? ";
while (<>) {
rm -rf /home/$_
}
print "You should have plenty of space now!";
BOfH.pl:
#!/usr/bin/perl -w
############################################
# BOfH Random Excuse Generator
# Word list from the BOfH Excuse board
# [http://bofh.ntk.net/ExcuseBoard.html]
# Copyright 2001, Simon Travaglia
#
# BOfH stories @ :
# http://www.theregister.co.uk/content/30
# and http://bofh.ntk.net/Bastard.html
#
#
# perl by mexnix [http://mexnix.perlmonk.org
############################################
use strict;
my @words1 = qw(Temporary Intermittant Partial
Redundant Total Multiplexed
Inherent Duplicated Dual-Homed
Synchronous Bidirectional Serial
Asynchronous Multiple Replicated
Non-Replicated Unregistered Non-Specific
Generic Migrated Localised
Resignalled Dereferenced Nullified
Aborted Serious Minor
Major Extraneous Illegal
Insufficient Viral Unsupported
Outmoded Legacy Permanent
Invalid Deprecated Virtual
Unreportable Undetermined Undiagnosable
Unfiltered Static Dynamic
Delayed Immediate Nonfatal
Fatal Non-Valid Unvalidated
Non-Static Unreplicatable Non-Serious);
my @words2 = qw(Array Systems Hardware
Software Firmware Backplane
Logic-Subsystem Integrity Subsystem
Memory Comms Integrity
Checksum Protocol Parity
Bus Timing Synchronisation
Topology Transmission Reception
Stack Framing Code
Programming Peripheral Environmental
Loading Operation Parameter
Syntax Initialisation Execution
Resource Encryption Decryption
File Precondition Authentication
Paging Swapfile Service
Gateway Request Proxy
Media Registry Configuration
Metadata Streaming Retrieval
Installation Library Handler);
my @words3 = qw(Interruption Destabilisation Destruction
Desynchronisation Failure Dereferencing
Overflow Underflow NMI
Interrupt Corruption Anomoly
Seizure Override Reclock
Rejection Invalidation Halt
Exhaustion Infection Incompatibility
Timeout Expiry Unavailability
Bug Condition Crash
Dump Crashdump Stackdump
Problem Lockout);
# Optional 4th word
my @words4 = qw(Error Problem Warning
Signal Flag);
my $word1 = $words1[rand(scalar(@words1))];
my $word2 = $words2[rand(scalar(@words2))];
my $word3 = $words3[rand(scalar(@words3))];
my $word4 = $words4[rand(scalar(@words4))];
print "\n##############################\n";
print "#BOfH Random Excuse Generator#\n";
print "##############################\n\n";
print "Today's excuse: ";
print "$word1 $word2 $word3\n\n";
print "Use Optional 4th Word?\n";
print "(Answer \"yes\" if DUMMYMODE == ON) [yes/no]";
while (<>) {
if ($_ eq /yes/ or /y.*/) {
print "\n$word1 $word2 $word3 $word4\n";
exit;
} else {
exit;
}
}
my %mexnix = (email => "mexnix@hotmail.com", website => "http://mexnix.perlmonk.org");